tired /tī(ə)rd/

Synonyms

weary - jaded - worn-out - aweary - exhausted - fatigued

This is the best way to describe how I've been feeling lately. Even when, especially when, I workout. I barely get home and get food in my mouth before I'm half comatose, staring blankly at the t.v., awaiting a time when it is not shameful to go to bed (after 7:00pm at least). Nothing I've tried seems to help. I don't drink caffeine anymore, so no more ups and downs from that. I eat early enough that my sleep isn't disrupted by digestion. I get about 8 hours a night, but most of the time I would gladly continue to sleep for another 4 hours. I just don't know what my problem is. So, at the suggestion of a friend, I'm giving B12 a whirl. It's apparently supposed to help with this, so I guess we shall see. 

Do you ever get to tired to function? Even after a full night's sleep? Does exercise give you the instant endorphin rush (like my sister informed me she gets)? Or does it just make you more tired? 

New Year's Goals Check In #1-I'm in a Slump

I'm in a bit of a slump. It's been a little over a week since I've been to they gym. First I was letting life get in the way, and now, I'm sick and don't have the energy. I am really hoping this sinus thing is a quick healer, because I do not want to lose the progress I've already made and I am ready to make more progress. It's also causing me to be incredibly lazy about my food choices and getting things done around the house. All in all, being sick is a real motivation killer. I am hoping that I have the energy to ignore it this afternoon because I have a piece of furniture that needs spray painting and it is going to be a perfect 50 degrees outside.
Up until Sunday evening (the night said sinus devils infiltrated my head), I was actually doing pretty good about getting stuff done at home. I have been keeping my sink shiny and clean, keeping up with the dishes and even keeping my laundry done, and put away. Now, I've had a load of clean laundry in the dryer for two days, and a dishwasher full of clean dishes that need to be put away, but I just want to sleep when I'm at home. I'm giving myself a bit of a break because I do want to get over this, not get worse, or have it last forever. So tonight, I'll go home and paint that chair, and then crawl into my pj's, warm up a big bowl of chicken noodle soup (that I made last night-so I guess I did something), and sit in my big chair under a big blanky and rest.
What do you do when you're sick to feel better? Does it totally mess up your routine?

Step One: Shine the Kitchen Sink

Welcome to 2013. Last week I shared my goals for 2013 with you, so since then, I've really spent a lot of time pondering how to accomplish those goals. The one simple truth I've found that is common between all of them....you can't accomplish them if you don't get started. So, here it is, January 2nd...time for me to get started.
I'm going to share with you guys how I plan to get started on my goals, because once again...it makes me accountable. I know that those of you that read this will ask me how it's going next time I see you, just to keep me in check! And that, is one of the many things I love about you guys. So, thank you for reading! It means the world to me. Alrighty...here we go.
1.) Continuing with my get fit plan. I'm off to a bumpy start on this one. I still haven't figured out how to get my bum out of bed in the morning to make breakfast. I have everything I need for a smoothie, but I'll be honest...it's 12 degrees out...I don't want a smoothie. Today I wanted that cheesy, eggy goodness wrapped up in a tortilla. So I had it. I'm not mad at myself for it. That does me no good. I just know I can do better...disappointment...probably worse than anger. So I tanked on meal one of the day. I still have two meals to go and 363 days to improve. I'm going to go to the grocery store today after work and pick up some things that I can do a little prep work in advance and have healthy options for the rest of the week (especially good this week since I work 12 hour days on Thursday and Friday). I'm also planning to go to the gym after work. I'm not up to my 4 times a week yet, but I am going more often than I ever have. And I'm noticing it. The exercises that I do are getting easier...not easy by any means...but easier. I'm able to go a little bit faster, at a little bit more of an incline, for a little bit longer on the treadmill. I'm just going to keep focusing on these little improvements. These make the gym trips worthwhile for me...even when I don't see the scale numbers going down or notice any improvement in the way my clothes fit. That will come with time.
2.) Oops. I guess I kind of combined two with one since number two was getting better about eating. Oh well....see above for my plans!
3.) Finding a new career path. Well, I have already applied for one position that I found, and I am continuing to look on a daily basis. Unfortunately, that is all the control I can have over that. So, I am trying to have a little control about the position I am currently in. I find things to keep me busy to make the days bearable. tomorrow and Friday are going to be hard. 24 hours of work during a holiday week. I don't know if there is enough to keep me going for that long, but I'm going to try!
4.) Working on my finances. Well, I already paid my first mortgage of 2013 and added an additional $32 to the payment. Ha! Funny that that is the exact amount of the increase that will soon be coming out of each of my checks thanks to the end of the tax breaks. My plan for this is to work more with what I have. I do need some new things, like workout shoes, clothes, and a few pieces of furniture, but I am making myself save up for them. I'm not allowed to go back to the old "oh the mortgage can be a month late because I need these shoes, and what are they gonna do, take my house?" move that I used to do all of the time. Bills come first. I am also planning to cut back on my fun money. I have a bad habit of going out and dropping $30-$60 on a meal and some drinks. I can still enjoy the company of my friends...at home...with food and drink...for A LOT less money. Even though I've cut back my going out drastically, I can still do more, and I am going to.
5.) Getting more settled into my house. I've already started on this one!! I rejoined Flylady last night. If you haven't seen this, and you need help getting organized and staying that way, I highly recommend it. She is a firm believer in baby steps. Like she says, "my house didn't get messy in one day, it's not going to get clean in a day either!" So, last night I unloaded my dishwasher, reloaded it with the sink full of dishes, and then I shined my sink (that's step one-seems little, but it makes a difference). Then, since it was the task for the day, I cleaned the sliding glass doors in my dining room. 15 minutes a day....I can do that! I have also started laying out plans to finish up some of the rooms in my house that will be inexpensive to complete, like my laundry room, kitchen and guest room. I have almost all of the stuff to complete them. I just need the time and motivation!
So, I'm getting there. Don't forget to keep asking me how it's going! Hope you are all having a fantastic 2013 so far!

See Ya Next Year...ha. ha. ha. ha.

Oh my. One of my least favorite things about this time of year. People just LOVE to say, see you next year. And they all think it's funny. Even if I've heard it 13 times that day, they seem to think that they are the only person on the planet original enough to come up with it. I still laugh. It's part of my job, but man oh man. I fight the eye roll.
One of my most favorite things about this time of year is that in 4 days we all get a fresh start! It's a shiny new year! Time to grab life by the horns and do all the things that we have ever dreamed of! Granted, in about 15 days, 80% of us will have given up on one or all of our resolutions. Or maybe you're like me, and anti-resolution? Well, normally I am, but this year, rather than calling them resolutions, I'm calling them goals. Resolutions are such a flash in the pan. Goals sound much more...um...solid. So without further adieu, I share with you my GOALS FOR 2013 (Sharing them means I need you guys to check in with me from time to time to make sure that I'm achieving my goals!)

1. Continue with my getting fit plan. The last couple of weeks haven't been so great. I've not been to the gym much at all really. I am still so good at making excuses for reasons to not go. I need to stop with the excuses. My goal for 2013 is to get in a workout 4 days a week on average. Sometimes I may get on a roll and get in 5 or 6, and sometimes, I may feel like utter pooh and only get in one. But I'd like to do physical activity 208 of the 365 days of 2013.

2. Get better about my eating. I'm already doing better....most of the time...but I have a long way to go. I need to avoid the siren song of McDonald's and their damn breakfast burritos. They are just so good and so easy and so warm on the cold mornings we've been having. Yes, boys and girls, you read it here first...I am back to my burrito habit. It's the only time I eat fast food which is a VAST improvement over me from about 2 months ago, but it's not where I want to be yet. I want to not want the damn things. I want to WANT to cook...to get up 20 minutes early so I can eat a good healthy breakfast before I leave for work.

3. Speaking of work. I am ready to move on. I've been in my current position for 8 years, and I've officially hit a big brick wall. I can't learn anything else from this job, I can't move up, I can't take on new responsibilities. I can just keep coming in and doing the same dreaded work every day. I am bored to tears with my position, and I find that that is never a good thing. So, even though I've always perused job postings and even applied here and there for one that sounds interesting, in 2013 I am going to really amp up the job search. I am going to figure out what it is that I want to do...what I could feel a little passionate about...and I am going to persue it with wild abandon. And hopefully, something will come to fruition for me.

4. Continue to work on my finances. In 2012, I got everything paid current. It was the best feeling in the world. In 2013, I'm trying to pay things down. I don't have any credit cards...thank goodness...but I have my mortgage and my car payment, and I'm adding a little bit to each payment to help get them paid down a little faster. It's not a lot, but it's something. And if I just calculate it as part of my payment, I'll never miss it. I also want to build up my savings this year. I have never had an emergency fund, and that is just NOT OKAY. So I'm starting small. $50 a paycheck for now, but hoping to build to closer to $150 a check soon. I want to have something to fall back on if I ever need it. I don't want to ask my mom for help all the time.

5. Last, I am going to really get settled into my house. I have plans to finish off various rooms and I'm going to follow through with them. Some just require a little elbow grease and some paint. Some need to be completely refurnished. Either way, I'd like to get going on them and quit living in disarray!

So, what are your goals for 2013? Or are you a fan of resolutions? I hope you all have a very happy new year!!

It's Gonna Snow!!

Today is a much better day. I walked away all the frustration of yesterday on the treadmill. I really can't think of anything better than working up a good sweat to get rid of anger..except maybe wine...which I didn't even drink last night. That's just another bonus to working out. Once I finish a workout, I don't want to ruin it by drinking, and if I'm working out the next day, I don't want to feel groggy, so I don't drink then either. Needless to say, that means I drink A LOT less than I used to. Ultimately, I do suppose that is a good thing, but I do miss my wine! I did make a decision to skip the gym tonight. I'm having major issues with my feet. I think I need thicker socks because my feet slip around in  my shoes a bit and cause a little friction which is making the bottoms of my feet BURN. They still really hurt today, so I thought I'd do an evening of stretching at home...have to get the hammies loosened up a little! And then back to the gym tomorrow
I am super excited for the snow that we are supposed to get tonight. I predict that it won't end up being that bad because it never is as bad as "they" make it out to be. Fortunately for me, I guess, I drive to work WAY before everyone else is out and about and I leave before rush hour in the afternoon, so I can avoid the crazies that will be out on the road.
Hope everyone stays safe and warm tonight!!

We All Have Shitty Days

So, I'm trying to keep up with this whole blogging thing. It holds me somewhat accountable for things and a few people have even mentioned that they enjoy reading it. I don't really have a lot to say today since I'm trying to keep this blog positive, but in order to also keep it real, I figured I couldn't just write on my happy days. Today is NOT a happy day. I woke up this morning and my back is twinging a little. There is nothing that can ruin my day like my back hurting. I get almost paralyzed with fear that if I do anything, it will go out and I'll be incapacitated for a week again. For anyone that has a bad back, you know what I'm talking about. For those that don't, consider yourself lucky! I also stepped on the scale last night and low and behold, I've gained about 5 pounds. Add in a horrendous morning at work and I am just feeling less than stellar about EVERYTHING. I keep trying to remind myself that we all have days like this...the kind that make you find the negative in every little thing that happens. Alas, I can only remind myself so many times. When it's your very own shitty day, it's hard to see past it and appreciate the good. Days like this I bombard myself with all of my mom's silly cliches that annoy me so much..."it could always be worse." " Everything happens for a reason." "God won't give you more than you can handle." Well, I know it could be worse. And tell me mom, what is the reason?? I can't think of one. And lastly, God has a lot more faith in me than I have in myself because I really feel like I'm at my breaking point. (I'm sure at this point you're wishing I would just stick to the postitive posts!)

So today, today is a shitty day. I hope I wake up tomorrow to a much less shitty day. But for today, I'm putting my nose to the grindstone at the office. I've made it through other horrible days here...and I know I'll have more. Then I'm going to hit the gym and see Jason, which almost always perks me up. And then I'm going home...and I'm going to open that bottle of wine in the fridge and have a glass and toast my shitty day...and then shut the door on it and not look back.

What do you do when you have a horribly awful, no good day?

Hi Ho. Hi Ho. It's Back to the Gym I Go.

So it's only been a week since I was at the gym and only 4 days since my last workout, but I can tell. I'm not sleeping well. I'm tired all the time. I don't even eat the same. Lazy Keri craves carbs and cheese. Kick Ass Keri craves veggies and protein. I am looking forward to Kick Ass Keri making a comeback later today. I don't get to go back to boot camp, which I can tell you, I am bummed about. But, I am going to hit the treadmill for a bit and do some work with Jason on some exercises to strengthen my core and my back. I will have a strong core that will support my back. I will! I will not live a life full of fear of doing things like starting the lawn mower, emptying the dishwasher, painting my deck, or putting on pants (all things I was doing when my back has gone out.) I am looking forward to sweating. I am looking forward to my legs and my stomach "muscles" feeling the burn. I am looking forward to not thinking twice about bending down to pick something up off of the floor! I was going to take my measurements every week or so and post updates, but I'm not going to this week since I haven't done much of anything...and I haven't been eating so great because when your back hurts, the last thing you want to do is stand in the kitchen and cook. So check back next week and I'll have a progress report for you!