Fear

I'm working on my 5th week of working out and eating right and things are going absolutely amazingly. I found out today that I am now down 15.9 pounds-pretty damn amazing if you ask me! I am working out 5-6 days a week and nine times out of ten I want to go to the gym when it's time-no more sense of dread. Eating right is becoming second nature. I don't have any desire to eat the crappy food I used to consume daily. When I do miss something, I allow myself to have some and it usually isn't the way I remember it.  The crappy stuff just doesn't taste good to me anymore, and even if it does, knowing what it will do to my body makes my desire for it wane. So much good happening for me!
But, with the good is always the occasional bad. My knee and my shoulder have really been fighting me lately. My body just isn't used to this much activity, and it is starting to revolt. I'm working with Trainer Jason to strengthen my shoulder....new exercises that I do almost every day, but my knee is another story. My knee hurting scares me a little. I know that if it hinders my workouts, I could easily end up right back where I was five weeks ago. Naturally, I want to take some impact off my knee. I'm sure you are all thinking the exact same thing as me.....swimming!
I used to be on swim team.  I love the water. I know all the strokes. But something, some stupid fear holds me back. I just can't get myself to open those doors and get in the water.
It's a combination of fears really. First, I have to put on a swimming suit. I haven't worn a swimming suit in public in at least 2 years, and even then it was just in front of friends. My brain knows that no one at the gym gives two shits about how I look in my swimming suit. They are there to make themselves better, just like I am. But, I can't get that message through to the rest of me. I have a new suit that fits. I've had it for 6 months or longer. It's always in the bottom of my gym bag, tags still on, just in case one day this irrational fear decides to subside, or I finally decide to not listen to it.
Secondly, I don't know how the pool works. It always seems like all of the lanes are taken, so do I just have to hang out and wait for a lane to open? How do I call dibs on a lane while I'm waiting?  How do I do this?!?! I know, I know. Just ask someone, right? Yeah. That would be rational. This fear is not rational.
Finally, what if I totally suck? I know I have years of experience swimming every single stroke, but what if I've forgotten? Is it like riding a bike? Will I be able to swim more than one or two laps?
I am really working to overcome these fears, but it's amazing how paralyzing a fear can be. I'm definitely open to any suggestions you guys might have for overcoming fears. Wish me luck!